Life is a little crazy right now. It won’t last forever. Normal may look a little different when we’re through all of this. The air may be cleaner, the seas bluer. One thing is certain… life will go on. But for now, when you feel like it will never end, you’re worrying about loved ones, your heart is beating out of your chest and you don’t know why… just breathe.
Inhale slowly for a count of 5… hold for 3 seconds…. exhale for a count of 8…. repeat 10 times.
You will be ok. Just breathe.
No matter what your thoughts are about the pandemic, your kids have undoubtedly heard about coronavirus (CV). Maybe they’re school has been closed, they’ve had events cancelled, parents are all talking about it. Kids feel social stress. But they feel it differently than adults do. Here are 2 simple things you can do to help them get through this crazy time….
1. TALK to your kids about coronavirus- First learn what they have heard!
- Ask them- Have you heard grownups or your friends talking about CV? What are they saying? We often give kids more information than they need to know, so keep your answers age appropriate and simple. Like this, ‘Viruses are tiny germs that can make people sick. People pass them to each other by coughing and sneezing.’
- Calmly answer their questions at their level. It’s OK to say ‘I don’t know’.
-Discourage older kids from getting information from social media sources. For older kids, read the CDC website together for information.
-Reassure them that you are doing what you can do to prevent the spread. (make sure you ARE!)
2. Give them control- SHOW and TEACH them what they can do to help!
-Hand washing!! Even toddlers can learn to wash their hands correctly! Make it fun. Wet hands. Soap. Wash all areas for 20-30 seconds. (sing the ABCs or recite the Pledge of Allegiance) Rinse well. Dry. (change that towel often!)
-Cover coughs and sneezes!! Use a tissue and throw it away- then wash your hands. Or if no tissue is available, use your sleeve. Young children will make mistakes! Try to teach and show them, not shame them when they’ve made a mistake. Model this behavior yourself!
-Try not to touch your face!! ‘Sometimes people cough or sneeze on the things we touch, and when we put our fingers in our mouth, nose or eyes, the virus can make us sick too.’
-It’s important to stay home! ‘Most people, especially kids, won’t get very sick from this virus, BUT it CAN make older people very sick, so when we stay home, we are protecting them.’
-Its ok to worry. Show them that you are doing everything you can to keep your family healthy. Let them help you clean. Show them how you reduce stress. Call distant family and friends to reassure them distant family members are ok. Search for kids’ meditations on YouTube, and meditate with them. (what a great time to teach kids how to meditate- and ourselves too!) And most importantly, be there to talk with them when they need to.
Check out these websites for kids info:
-Live Science Website for Kids’ Info: https://www.livescience.com/coronavirus-kids-guide.html
-American Academy of Pediatrics Info for Parents: https://www.healthychildren.org/English/health-issues/conditions/chest-lungs/Pages/2019-Novel-Coronavirus.aspx
-CDC: Talking with Children about Coronavirus: https://www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-ncov/community/schools-childcare/talking-with-children.html
Mary Roth is an RN, BSN, Certified Public Health Nurse, Certified Life and Health Coach who has practiced for over 35 years. She has over 30 years of school nursing experience, and has extensive experience writing policies and health coaching protocol for school districts as well as the VA.
There are a few things in my life that are frustrating for me right now. It is at these times that God, the Universe or whatever you choose to call a higher power, sends me a message. Today it was loud and clear…
This morning, the message came as a text from my son who is working on Great Abaco Island, “One hell of a storm in the Bahamas right now”. There is no running water, no electricity, no promise of dry shelter, clothes, or a dry place to sleep for most of the people of Great Abaco tonight. Yet they survive, and somehow make each day on their island better than the last.
What helps us to maintain perspective and keep going when life feels overwhelming?
Gratitude. The quality of being thankful and acknowledging the goodness in your life. In positive psychology research, gratitude is strongly and consistently associated with greater happiness.
Its not hard to start focusing on gratitude….. say thanks! or write a thank-you to someone.
Start a gratitude journal- every day write down 3 things that you are grateful for.
Notice the small things everywhere….a pleasant sound, the warmth of the sun…
For me today? I’m grateful for you, who are reading this, my dogs Kodi and Zeke, and my amazing kids.
I’m grateful for the text I got this morning. It helped me to refocus, so I’m now able to send my thoughts, prayers, and good vibes for strength and courage to the people of the Bahamas as they rebuild their lives, and for all those working to help them. Thank You!
I usually try not to preach, but this morning I heard a doctor on the radio talking about diabetes. She reported some pretty scary statistics. 50% of adult Americans have diabetes or prediabetes. She talked about all the old and new medications being used for treatment.
I talk to people every day who’ve been taught that insulin or oral medications are the fix. ‘You’ll always be a diabetic. You’ll need to take this medication for the rest of your life’. They’re scared, and so they follow instructions and think they’re fixing their health with a shot or a pill. What they don’t understand is that this is a Band-Aid, NOT a fix. Its true that sometimes you need that band aid while you heal, but many don’t even realize that there IS a real fix. You CAN bring your blood sugar under control and reduce or eliminate the need for those medications. It’s not easy, like taking a shot or a pill. But lets be real….there IS NO medication that is free of chemicals and side-effects. Most doctors will suggest you change your diet and activity, but they don’t tell you how and most people are so overwhelmed they don’t even know where to start.
Here are my thoughts….
First think about WHY you want to be healthier. Its different for every person, but your ‘why’ is very important. Next, identify your overall goal, and then the baby steps you need to take to reach it. Like a roadmap. How will you get to your destination? Think about your stress level, sleep, fluids, nutrition, and activity and choose actions you can accomplish pretty easily. One week at a time.
1. Can you think of ONE SMALL change you could make to your diet for 1 week? Something as small as drinking water with meals, or eating breakfast in the morning?
2. Pick ONE SMALL change you could make to your activity for 1 week? Can you walk to the end of the driveway and back every day?
Make up your mind to start today with one small change, and build on that.
I’m happy to help if you need support.
I went for a hike with my daughter Sunday morning. The area we hiked had burned in one of last year’s wildfires. I’ve hiked these areas before, and am always surprised at how quickly they regenerate with new growth and wildlife. The massive old oak trees show the scars from years of burns, yet they continue to grow and sprout new branches.
Just like the trees, we survive our burns, and grow stronger. The scars remain to remind us how experience changes us while allowing us the choice to put our energy into new growth for the future.
"Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things." Robert Brault
This morning, I drove off in a hurry…. I was irritated by the Monday morning alarm, the dog wouldn’t cooperate for his medicine, an egg hit the floor. Not a great morning, and not in a great mood. As I drove down the hill and rounded the corner, I was struck by the view of the valley before me. The morning sun was shining on the mountains in the distance, the grass and leaves were shiny with dew, the air was so still, and just the newness of the day was all so beautiful. I had to actually stop the car to take it all in for a moment.
And in that moment, my whole day changed. I completely forgot about how I thought my morning had been going and was reminded of and so grateful for how amazing my life is.
Sometimes I get bogged down by all the things I have to remember and do, and forget to take just that moment to enjoy the things that bring me joy. When I take that moment, it changes my day, and that changes my life.
“There’s something not hooked up right with your boys” is what a school psychologist said to me when my sons were 5. At the time, there wasn’t a name for what ‘wasn’t hooked up right’. First ADHD, then PDD, EBD, LD, and finally Asperger Syndrome, though medicine has recently done away with that term as well. Now it’s simply autism.
Life has not been an easy road for these two guys. It’s not easy for anyone who is different. But each time I saw my sons bullied, or taken advantage of, even now at age 36, I’m amazed at how they continue to grow stronger. I’m inspired as they see the best in everyone, and and so incredibly proud as they show us all the real meaning of forgiveness and love.
I hope you will join me in wishing a Very Happy Birthday to Ryan and Brad.
Welcome to Holland by Emily Perl Kingsley
“When you’re going to have a baby, it’s like planning a fabulous vacation trip – to Italy. You buy a bunch of guidebooks and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum, the Michelangelo David, the gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It’s all very exciting.
After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, “Welcome to Holland.”
“Holland?!” you say. “What do you mean, Holland?” I signed up for Italy! I’m supposed to be in Italy. All my life I’ve dreamed of going to Italy.
But there’s been a change in the flight plan. They’ve landed in Holland and there you must stay.
The important thing is that they haven’t taken you to some horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It’s just a different place.
So you must go out and buy a new guidebook. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.
It’s just a different place. It’s slower paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you’ve been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around, and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills, Holland has tulips, Holland even has Rembrandts.
But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy, and they’re all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life you will say, “Yes, that’s where I was supposed to go. That’s what I had planned.”
The pain of that will never, ever, go away, because the loss of that dream is a very significant loss.
But if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn’t get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things about Holland”
Sometimes life takes you in a direction that you didn’t plan, but isn’t that just the beauty of it all.
April is Autism Awareness month.
Congratulations to all the families of individuals with autism. They are truly tulips and Rembrandts!
I try to start every day with gratitude… for a new day, my good health, or a beautiful sunrise. It’s pretty easy for me because I have so much to be thankful for. As kids, we see the magic in everything! Bugs, a rock… we don’t see the stinger, or the sharp edge. Over time, we start to look for the dangers, the bad stuff that could happen. And our adult thoughts usually default in that direction.
Yesterday I was talking to someone who brought gratitude to a whole new level. He’s been diagnosed with a chronic illness that brought his active life to a complete standstill with severe pain. He said to me, “I’m alright. I’m so thankful because it could have been something much worse.” I thought about this a lot last night. He’s thankful. And that’s amazing!
As I thought about him, I felt so uplifted and inspired. He’s facing a huge challenge, and his thoughts have defaulted to gratitude! He reminded me that no matter what, there is ALWAYS something to be grateful for. In this moment, I am grateful for you, Steve. Thanks!
Yesterday, while working at my desk, I felt my back aching and noticed that I’d been hunched over my computer for 3 hours without getting up. This is always a problem for me, so I have my watch set to vibrate a reminder of my goal to get up and move every hour. Yesterday, I was ‘in the zone’ and hadn’t moved at all. Now, I KNOW that if I don’t move my back will hurt. And that familiar little voice told me, ‘You are so dumb. You did it again. You never take care of yourself’.
Thinking about this today, I understand how easy it is to set goals, and then backslide for whatever reason. We all do it. Then we allow that mean, negative little voice to beat us down and tell us how bad we are, and that we’ll never change. And when we hear it enough, we begin to accept it as truth. We’re caught in a cycle of try-fail-beat ourselves up-panic –repeat, without even thinking about it. But why? And how can we change it?
The first step is to listen and be mindful. Sit with that voice for a while, just being aware of it and what it says to you. Things you have experienced during your life CREATED that voice. It has a positive side, simply wanting to protect you from failure and disappointment by encouraging you not to try again. Think about the experiences in your life that created it. What hurt or failure is it protecting you from? And then, just ‘Let it Be’.
The next time you hear that voice, acknowledge it… Let it be, and let it go. ‘I know that voice, and I understand it’s trying to protect me from failure, but that was then, and I don’t need that protection now. I got this.’ You GOT this!
Bandaids.
“I’m ok now. The doctor gave me a pill” is what a friend of mine said to me the other day. She was happy that her health was out of immediate danger. Calmed by the knowledge that the pill she was prescribed is taking care of it for her. “I’m glad” was my reply. And I am. I’m glad that she saw her doctor, and happy that with his guidance her health IS more stable. Doctors and medications save lives. Rule #1- when your health is out of control, the first and most important step is to see your health care provider, and follow their recommendations!
But it really made me stop and think about how people choose to take a pill for the rest of their lives over making a few changes to help correct the problem. Its like a bandaid. That bandaid is so necessary when the cut is new and deep. It helps stop the stop the immediate bleeding and control the risk of infection. But at some point, we know that our body will heal, maybe with a little help, and that bandaid can come off.
Once the immediate issue is stable, give some serious thought to what the choices are for the future. Rule #2- there are ALWAYS choices! You NEVER have to remain stuck. If you’re not sure what your choices are, talk to someone you trust, or better yet, a professional you trust. Really think about your health and what you want for your future.
Then, make a choice. Rule #3- you must choose! Not making a choice IS a choice. Keep doing what you’ve always done, and be happy with that. Many people make this choice. OR you can choose change, and improve your health. Changing habits is hard. It takes time. It is not the ‘easy’ way out. But I promise you, you CAN change if you want to.
Take the time. Rule #4- lasting change is made in baby steps. One small step at a time is all you need to slowly start your body on the road to healing itself. Once your body begins healing, you can talk with your doctor about slowly peeling back that bandaid.
Bandaids or changes? The choice is yours.
